“A young student of mine… his father committed suicide on Friday.”

Today’s guest post is by Aaron Huey, who walks his talk big time.

The Desperate Divinity of Masculinity

A young student of mine… his father committed suicide on Friday.

I see yet another boy left alone to find his way to manhood without guidance from his father. I see it and I deal with it everyday. I see the suffering lost boy trying not to turn into Captain Hook again and again.

I see and feel the feminine reaching towards their divinity. The struggle of feminism has become a powerful cause trumpeted throughout schools and workshops, camps and seminars. More women graduate from HS and College now. More enter the workplace.

The silent war on boys continues. Boys raised by mothers who cannot understand (or have suffered from) the darkness of masculine emotion and compartmentalization of feeling and love, grow up unable to comprehend their own masculine emotions. Boys who’s fathers move further and futher away, mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually… as their lives get hard and complicated, these boys are left alone to fend for themselves in a wilderness that they are not CAPABLE of surviving in without serious compromises. Not because they are lazy or unwilling… No-one taught them how.

From all outward appearances Peter Pan seem to do pretty well. Truth was, his life was a mess. That’s why he turned into Captain Hook.

As women begin to embrace their inherent power, who among us men will dare to call himself God to balance these Goddesses? What man will step forward and express the divinity of the judgmental, absent, elusive, father figure who condemns us as well as loves us for our struggle?

Connecting with God comes with certain rules and boundaries that are available only to the learned.

Connecting with the Eternal Father is a mystery protected by morals and dogma.

The Goddess is a all flowing force of authentic feminine presence. If every woman is a Goddess…

What is God? Is he me? Is he my absent, alcoholic, dead father who awaits me with reward for my triumph of life? Is he my loving and present dad who continues to guide me through his judgment of my contribution?

Am I He for my step-son? How dare I say that…

Men, we must find ourselves for our sons. We must include them in our lives, our work and our hearts.

What the fuck are we waiting for? When do we realize that our children suffer without us? When do realize that we are not supposed to work, live, or be parents alone? When do we stop letting our feelings get in the way of our work AS FATHERS? What excuse could possibly be powerful enough to leave the boys of this world stranded as mortals among women who are embracing their Divinity? How will they ever find balance?

If you are a present father in your son’s life…thank you. If you are not, please read the last paragraph.

Here is to true balance.


Check out the life-altering adventures created by Aaron and his team at Fire Mountain and the Sober Living Home for Teens in Colorado.

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  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Josh-Sharp/100000533941882 Josh Sharp

    First of all, I honor your passion to be helpful to others. Thank you for caring and taking the time. I too share the same interest in seeing suffering alleviated in the world.

    From my beliefs and understanding of Buddhism: In this reality, Masculine and Feminine (Energy), Penis and Vulva, Sexual preference, etc, are all opposites on separate, infinite continuum’s that define our perceived duality, or states of opposites. Your state of being Masculine or Feminine would be based on your Karma, or your dominant mental state in your last birth (assuming no progression in death). Your body style, sexual preference, and state of Energy may or may not jive to your or the World’s current, somewhat arbitrary mix of preferences. Improved Karma, and happiness is attained in ones acceptance of what IS and thereby tapping into the Power to help BALANCING these two energies. It progresses one towards a balanced view of each dichotomy so as to be able to see the Enlightened perspective and the Divinity of each. It is the true seeing of and focus on the Divinity, and disciplining the Mind to weed out that which is not, that gives and brings forth the Divinity of any of these. I think some other text wrote: “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” Thought creates reality.

    You expressed some frustration in folks tending to be neutered in language now a days… Your frustration/suffering is due to the fact that you are focusing on the duality and not the Divinity. If I were to model a Divine/Balanced way of life to both my children, each with different biology, with equanimity, or uniformity as it pertains to gender or anything for that matter, would this not be better than NEEDING Mom and Dad to both be present, modeling a paired balanced relationship? Have we not seen the difficulty this line of thinking perpetuates? The suffering? I think my “fluid” way of thinking it about it clears things up quite nicely and allows everyone else to be utterly unique in their particular mix. I have no doubt in my heart that Christ, as did the Buddha, knew this to be true. Today’s cultures are mostly based on people’s attempt to do the best they can in a world of apparent opposites. All suffering is based on attachment. Let your mind be like fluid until it rests on the knowledge that your Heart and Inner Knowledge concur with.

    I do agree with your feeling that there is a need for balance. That as we start a slide in the direction of the Feminine, we be VERY mindful of when to stop at the balanced point. May Love and Light light our way on this path.


  • William

    This interests me. My father also committed suicide.

  • Bamgmt

    Ok genius, guilty as charged…Now how do I fix it with my son when I never had it from my father?