Author Archives: davidcates

Deeper Than Pleasure

What’s the quickest route to the Deep Masculine? Shift attention from your cock to your balls. The cock, after all, is just a delivery system for the real goods. Women, similar progression to the Deep Feminine:  Shift your focus from … Continue reading

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Sex Creates Realities

Make no mistake about it: sex is power. Kingdoms rise and fall for sex. Societies legislate marriage to control sex. Churches advocate celibacy, on pain of hell. They want to keep the genie in the bottle. The raw experiential nature … Continue reading

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The Power (and Misuse) of Men Apologizing to Women

Today I stumbled on a Facebook page of men’s apologies, generalized to All Women Everywhere. (links at end of this post) I’ve used this exercise in workshops with astonishingly powerful results. Men and women breaking down and sobbing, lives changing, … Continue reading

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How Can New Moms Help New Dads Adjust to Her Changing Sexuality?

Image via Wikipedia Nekole Malia Shapiro is the founder of In a recent Facebook exchange she asked me: I pose the same question to you that I asked Dr. Northrup in the Ecstatic Birth Tele-Summit session last night. Having … Continue reading

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Guest Post

The Mature Masculine by Boysen Hodgson He cleans up after himself. He cleans up the planet. He is a role model for young men. He is rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic. He holds himself accountable. He knows what he feels. … Continue reading

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Guys, the google search term ain't "Men's Work"

“Men’s Work” is a tool-belt full of bizarre-looking tools that the guy on the street can see no use for. Wait till a man’s ready to build: a home, a family, sex, a career, money, community, a stairway out of his pit. THEN suddenly those tools gain value. Not because he wants the tools themselves… but because he wants to build something. Continue reading

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Toppling The Monolithic "Ideal Man"

Recovering from an intense, rocky, miraculous weekend at the Evolving Men’s Conference in Boulder. I went expecting a unified vision to emerge, and collective action. Apparently so did most of the other leaders who had gathered. What we got instead … Continue reading

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Can Men Evolve?

Your daddy’s masculinity is out of date. Testosterone has trashed the global economy.

Women are overtaking men in the job market and in colleges. The future looks grim.

Young men seem locked into perpetual boyhood. Nobody wants to grow up.

The men’s movement is disappearing down its own navel.

Can men evolve? Continue reading

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Is Your Sex Life Sustainable? The Boom-Boom Times Are Over, My Friend.

The sex lives that will survive these downsized times will focus on the same themes that will drive the new green economy.

Deep connection to the earth and nature’s cycles. (Read: Deep connections to our bodies, not our most outrageous fantasies.) Continue reading

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The Secret of Continuous Orgasm – The Naked Pulse – Is Buried Deep In Your Body

There is a pulse inside our bodies, deeper than heartbeat, below the level of synaptic firing. This pulse aligns us with the rhythm of life. This pulse attunes us to the music of creation. When we surrender to this trembling … Continue reading

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